Making changes: Why it's tough (and how to make it easier)
Have you ever wondered why changing your life, even when you really want to, feels like an uphill battle?
You're definitely not alone. Many of us struggle to make changes. It can feel like we lack willpower, but there's actually a lot more going on.
There are many reasons why change is difficult and a major factor is due to how our brains are wired.
The human brain is an incredibly complex organ that uses around 20% of our body’s energy. Because it uses a lot of energy, our brains are wired to be as efficient as possible.
To save energy, our brains prefer us to stick to familiar routines and habits. We have well-worn neural pathways for things we do regularly. Change means creating new pathways, which takes effort. It's like making a new trail through a dense forest instead of walking down a clear path. No wonder it feels hard!
On top of that, our brains are designed to keep us safe. We’re wired for survival. When we think about trying something new, our brains might throw up warning signals like doubts, worries, and "what ifs." This isn't because we're weak or lazy (our minds might also tell us that). It's actually because our brains are trying to protect us from risk, discomfort and the unknown.
But here's the good news: our brains are also incredibly adaptable. They can and do change throughout our lives. We learn new skills, and languages, and adapt to all sorts of situations. So, while change can be difficult, it's also absolutely possible.
So how can we work with our biology when we want to make a change? Here are some tips to make change a little easier:
Start small: Big changes can feel overwhelming, triggering your brain's resistance. Tiny steps are much less threatening. Want to move more? Start with just five minutes a day. Small wins build momentum.
Be kind to yourself: It's normal to experience resistance. Try not to beat yourself up about it. Instead, try to understand what's happening. What thoughts and feelings come up when you think about making the change? Self-compassion goes a long way. Moving forwards with kindness instead of criticism can make change easier and less stressful.
Reward yourself: When you achieve a small goal, celebrate it! This releases dopamine, a "feel-good" chemical in your brain, making the change more enjoyable and reinforcing the new behaviour.
Remember your "why": When things get tough, remind yourself why you're making the change in the first place. What are you hoping to achieve? How will it improve your life? Connecting to your motivation can help you work through resistance.
It's okay to get it wrong: Setbacks happen. Everyone experiences them. You can always try again. Learning and growing is a process.
Change is a journey, not a destination. It takes time, effort, and patience to see change through. By understanding how your brain works and using these strategies, you might find it easier to make lasting changes that will, in turn, help you create a more satisfying life.
Spending time with a coach can be invaluable when change feels overwhelming. Treat’s life coach Cathy Eden offers a therapeutic coaching approach to help you identify what you want and where hidden beliefs or blocks might be getting in the way. Together, you can understand the factors that influence your behaviour and address the underlying issues that might be contributing to your struggles with change.
Cathy can help you to develop strategies that suit your needs and also provide the accountability, encouragement, and tools you need to keep moving towards the changes you seek, even when things are tough.
If you'd like support on your journey, our coach Cathy offers a free 30-minute introductory session. For more details, go to www.cathyeden.co.uk
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